Sunthing Special

When going back through a bunch of my BFF’s old letters from our first year in college we discovered that things back then weren’t actually quite how we remember them now. For example, my BFF was living at home, working a lot and going to school full-time. Her letters tell that this was a pretty stressful time for her, especially once you added guy troubles to the mix. This was true for most of us, yet we tend to look back and think “Oh, the college years were the best. They were so easy … no responsibilities, just fun.” I’m also curious about which stuff we block out and why. For example, in a couple of her letters to me she mentioned some guy named Al I was apparently interested in, if not dating, and how it was too bad he turned out to be such a jerk. But now neither she nor I have a clue to who this guy was. Another time she sent me a two-page letter simply to sympathize over how a boyfriend treated me and how she wanted to kill him if she saw him. However, she didn’t refer to what the boyfriend had done to me to provoke her outrage and I have no memory about that either. It’s all very interesting …

I was out in the rain today waiting for the kids’ busses wearing a sweatshirt jacket. I was using an umbrella but the jacket still got pretty wet since the rain was coming down so hard. After I came in I was chilled and wanted to put a jacket on to keep warm. Of course the one I was just wearing was damp, so I threw it in the dryer for a few minutes to make it warm and cozy. Doing that reminded me of how as teenagers we would throw our jeans in the dryer before we went out for the night to make sure they were as tight as possible. Egads. Now I’m all about wearing clothes as cozy and comfortable as possible as often as I can.

The fact that I’m an admittedly poor driver has never dulled my love of the road. As soon as I got my license (on the third try) I was off. I often went on solo road trips, and through the years have driven not only all over Ohio, but to Canada, South Carolina, Pennsylvania, New York, Maryland and more. But now, months after totalling my third (!) vehicle and recently getting a speeding ticket, not only is the joy of driving gone, but now I almost dread it. Some days this summer I’ve been driving 2-4 hours just going back and forth from here to there and there to here. I wish I weren’t. But for me, staying in one place is ten times worse. Then there’s driving at night. What used to be kind of relaxing — driving on a sparsely populated highway in the dark – now makes me uncomfortable, especially when there are orange barrels and lane closures and whatnot. I feel like my eyes aren’t sharp enough anymore. Yet I don’t want to be a nervous driver, either. It’s times like this I wish I lived in NYC and didn’t have to have a car to get around.

I don’t know what’s making me feel a bit more melancholy today — my mother celebrating a milestone birthday, or my niece becoming the fourth of my 12 nieces and nephews to turn 18. Both make me feel old.